The endless rain like a wound re-opening, the feeling of hopelessness in the face of regret.
'Oh my love I can't let go...'
After; sun. Rays of illumination. Perception slowly shifting; sun flares; glimmers of gold.
Everything taking on the assemblage of significance again, every little thing mattering. Vindication. Redemption. Gold glint of memories, precious, priceless, lit, bit by bit, by love.
Love never goes away does it...not really. It lingers long, first as an ache, then as something sweet and amicable, a heady kind of mix of bittersweet.
Don't know why but summer to me always starts off in Band of Horses tones. Wide open prairies , sweeping sunny spaces and endless horizon lines measured out in guitar gustos.
Reliving heartache... unexpectedly. Something you thought you'd gotten rid of.... returns with a vengeance; turns out to be a perpetual pain, inescapable. Gasp. Exile the regret, villify if necessary. It still doesn't work. The heart watches it all with a thousand eyes.
This first song 'Fear' by Sarah McLachlan resounds with power. The kind of power that comes when you swallow the fear and propel yourself against it.... into heady fearlessness. This song is my reminder that fearlessness goes hand-in-hand with being true to yourself. If you have the courage to do that, then everything else, all other fears, will naturally dissolve. Now, to hear this song again, is always an ear-opening epiphany. Feel the goosebumps:
And soaring into the lovely heights of living without fear...